Unfortunately, human beings are time travelers. We spiral in and out of any given experience we’ve had. How I can reach for my cup and suddenly I’m on the back deck, it is late August, I am reaching for the same drink at a different time. And then I’m back. It tastes better in the summer, but at least it makes me feel closer to that feeling. I thought I might feel at home in the winter, being the home of my birth month, but mostly I feel powerless. Except for when it snows, of course, but that’s because of the time traveling I just mentioned.

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I time travel multiple times a day and sometimes in my dreams. You can tell you’re time traveling because reality becomes muted by something much stronger. It could be the song playing, or a taste in your mouth, or any fleeting moment. And in the moment it’s possible you won’t even be aware you’re traveling, but you are. And the version of yourself you travel to knows it. That’s all I’m really sure of, anyways. 

Nostalgia is one of the easiest time traveling machines. To long for something in blurry retrospect is one of the most powerful manifestations of reliving it, even if reliving it becomes a delusion. It is the power we possess in our minds to suppress the modern perception of reality and say, “No, instead I’ll exist in the perception of a differing collective.” It is interesting to me how an entire collective consciousness can overlay infinite perceptions, as ours does. But then again I’m a simulation created by an infinite consciousness and it gave me the form of a queer barista, so.

I’m sure that one of the feelings we’re here, on Earth, to embrace is exhaustion. There has never in history been a happy, well-rested society. It seems likely that the exhaustion, the limitation of these sore limbs in a work-focused life, is a part of the whole big reason for everything. I say we should, every now and then, celebrate our inherent and inevitable tiredness. There will be mornings we wake up unready; there will be nights where we are not under our own control. 

Emotional exhaustion must be a bonus point special in the video game of life. If you are willing to experience pain in any form it comes in, you are unstoppable. Sometimes I can initiate hard conversations just by knowing that I will move forward in my experience here by doing so. Today someone told me, “It’s not even the physical exhaustion, it’s the emotional exhaustion of having to coddle others,” about a job. I find that our physical self can die, unlike our emotional and spiritual self, but at the same time it has a higher tolerance for pain. More of our body can be opened and rearranged than our beliefs and values at any given time. This isn’t to sound brutal or gross, but to, like I said, appreciate our own exhaustion.

I’m sorry you live in a world, society, experience, that forces you to experience a deprivation of energy so constantly. However, more than that, I am proud of how you haven’t let go of your tired body, in spite of the ways it failed you and scared you. We hear often that our family and friends can be hard on us because they love us, and I believe the same goes for us and our bodies. We are hard on these bodies, push them to their extremes, for the reason that we believe in them. Even on the worst day, every morning we trust that our feet and hands will carry us into the experiences before us.

Today, MARS is Squaring PLUTO and the MOON is in ARIES, my home MOON. Which means that I felt the rage that exists in a version of me I don’t always identify with. I felt less empathetic towards others and, as a result, felt a disconnection between us before there was even a chance for a connection. Some days are just like that. Planetary movement aside, some days really are just like that. At least when we’re mad we have the energy to tread forward through the thick simply for the reason that we are burning anyways.

Sometimes it feels like a waste that I don’t get to know everyone I’ve ever met’s birth chart. For science, anyways, or statistics. I just like to collect data and the only place I can get astrology data to learn from is people themselves. Books are great, but they cannot account for the differing attributes existing in every individual’s chart. I say that within five years we can choose to have our big three floating over our head like a hologram. I will probably not participate at first, seeing as I have my Scorpio Mars holding me back.

I think in order to survive these next couple days, we are going to have to connect with another human deeply and vulnerably. I think I have the perfect idea to assist in this homework assignment.

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You Need To Talk To A… Reading for the Signs

We all need help figuring out who needs to hear what from us. I’d like to help.

Readings apply to Sun, Moon, Rising, Mercury, Mars, and Venus.

ARIES ♈︎

The Hermit

You need to talk to a Virgo placement. You’ve been acting impulsive at the expense of a Virgo. This Virgo is frustrated with your actions, but they don’t find them unforgivable. The real problem, little ball of fire, is that you’re moving so fast right now that you haven’t slowed down to ensure boundaries and apologies are being integrated into the communication naturally. And who knows? Maybe the Virgo will finally apologize to you too for how hard they push you when they know you’re doing your best.

TAURUS ♉︎

The Star

You need to talk to an Aquarius placement. Your emotions are getting in the way of being honest here. You want to be open minded and flow with the Aquarius as easily as they manage to. It seems to you like they have life so figured out, so easy, but the truth is they’re just as confused as you. The only difference is that they voice themselves to you when they’re confused. You, on the other hand, tend to crawl into bed and overthink. Talk to them; you know they’ll understand where you’re coming from!

GEMINI ♊︎

The Hermit

You need to talk to a Virgo placement. This Virgo has made you feel more indecisive than ever, leaving you unsure of where you stand. In a way, you are obsessed with this person. Maybe not romantically, but their opinion matters to you more than you may admit to yourself. Because of this, you make an effort where they may be none coming back to you. You might feel like a paper bag blowing in the wind most of the time, but you need to let this Virgo know what’s really on your mind, because you’re looking for stability.

CANCER ♋︎

The Emperor

You need to talk to an Aries placement. Recently there may have been an experience where an Aries invalidated you or spoke over you with their strong, explosive sense of self-expression. What you need to remember, my little river, is that you’re allowed to bring up things of the past. I know that relationship advice always says let go of the past, and that’s true, but how can you let something go if you do not share it? Let the Aries know that you need to be able to express yourself just as strongly as they do, even if you don’t do it the same exact way. You’ll find them more responsive than you anticipate.

LEO ♌︎

The Emperor

You need to talk to an Aries placement. They have been distracting you from connecting with your intuition. They may make you feel good or bad, either way they want your attention physically or intuitively. You have a goal and until you speak with this person, you will find it hard to accomplish said goal. You don’t have to remove them from your life, but you have to establish the boundaries you’ve been avoiding so you can move together harmoniously.

VIRGO ♍︎

Death

You need to talk to a Scorpio placement. It’s okay to want reassurance. Who can blame you for wanting clarity with a Scorpio? I know their intense manner can intimidate you; intensity is usually chaotic. And you’re not chaotic, or at least you’ve only just begun trying new things with people. You might think they’re just saying what you want to hear, and Scorpio can be like that, but this time around consider genuinely trusting them. You just need to make the first step.

LIBRA ♎︎

The Lovers

You need to talk to a Gemini placement. You don’t want to be honest because this situation fits the stereotype of Geminis too much. Selfish, inattentive, and, if I’m being honest, materialistic right? You have been waiting for a Gemini to come around, and not just romantically. This person has deprived you of attention, mostly, but also resources to be successful in whatever projects you’ve set out to do together. You know, it’s justified to feel disappointed. Even for the sign of the Justice tarot card, you sure don’t appreciate ensuring your own justice in life, Libra. Tell them how you really feel. Who cares about how they respond? At the end of the day, all you really need is the truth.

SCORPIO ♏︎

The Chariot

You need to talk to a Cancer placement. You love them. No matter what they do or say, you find yourself paying attention. In the wise words of Tumblr in 2014, they make flowers grow in the darkest parts of you. You haven’t told them, or at least you haven’t told them directly. You think insinuating that you, unfortunately, have fallen for them is good enough. It isn’t. In addition to tell the Cancer how you feel, consider telling them your personal boundaries around this feeling. Is there anything to do about it? Anything you can’t emotionally handle? Let the line shine on all aspects of your being. Cancer themselves are a form of light.

SAGITTARIUS ♐︎

The Hierophant

You need to talk to a Taurus placement. Admit to yourself that you tried your best. You made every move you could, you said all the things you thought they wanted to hear. Wait a second. How did this Taurus get a Sagittarius so hung up on them? I know that what you want to hear is that trying is pointless if you don’t succeed, but that isn’t correct. It’s time to enter the ring with your mortal enemy: rejection. You can handle some kinds of rejections, sure; in the face of legal trouble, education failures, or friendships, you are a flow that cannot be stopped. But you are stumped with this Taurus placement. The moment you voice yourself, you’re free to go.

CAPRICORN ♑︎

Strength

You need to talk to a Leo placement. Tell them that you’re grateful for them, that no matter how hard you try to run away from this commitment you can’t. They don’t necessarily need your reassurance, but you need your own. You need to hear yourself tell this Leo how you feel about them in order to make it real. The only real things in your mind are your recent and future accomplishments. Would it really harm you to admit that there is a Leo that fits into your infinite list of accomplishments? And would it kill you to relax and have a good time with them?

AQUARIUS ♒︎

The Hierophant

You need to talk to a Taurus placement. After all this work you’ve made, you don’t want to be outshined by a Taurus. And no, this competition isn’t your creation, but that doesn’t mean you’re not a part of it. Whether it is professional or personal, there is a Taurus in your life making moves in a game of chess you didn’t know you were playing. It’s time to tell them how you feel; tell them you don’t see them as a threat. Maybe then they’ll loosen themselves up and, who knows, become a friend?

PISCES ♓︎

The Chariot

You need to talk to a Cancer placement. There is a sense of anger in this connection. You feel rushed by them to complete a goal, but you’re not even sure you can complete it. Meanwhile, Cancer is frustrated that you don’t believe in yourself. Here is a beautiful cycle. Would it be so difficult to accept accountability from them? You are both water signs, both incredibly emotional and reactive to life, almost at all times. The difference, however, is that Cancer shows up time and time again while you look for new options. It’s time to settle down, make a decision, and inspire your Cancer to see why they’ve loved you all this time.