Everything I enjoy doing, from writing blog posts to making art to recording my podcast, I try to convince others to start doing themselves. I have a tendency to be pushy about it, too focused on the benefits they’d receive from putting their work into something like this rather than the exhausting effort behind making it happen. Of course, when they do show interest I suddenly remember how many hours I spent building my website or coming up with ideas for my podcast episodes, and I feel overwhelmed on their behalf. Still, I can’t let go of the part of myself that wants everyone to make their own versions of my passions.

Maybe it comes from a feeling I have that humanity isn’t creating enough. It’s not like I can blame people, since our current structure is reliant on each person using most of their time alive to sustain themselves staying alive. Honestly, sometimes I can’t tell the difference between this and the times of hunting and gathering. In either time period we spend most of our time trying to survive. I just don’t know if we’re actually surviving if we’re not creating anything in the meantime. 

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I must also acknowledge that the creations of others might not always fit the structure of my own creations. Maybe that’s why I push so much for general sharing avenues, like a blog or a podcast. Anything of interest can be shared through these. That’s why for this blog post I thought I would walk through the process I went through of creating a blog and a podcast. I want to share why these instruments of connection have resulted in me producing more personal creations than I ever have before, and how you can do the same if you’d like to.

I’ll break this story-time and how-to into three parts. Part One: How to End the Internal Cringe, Part Two: How to Begin the Creation of the Creator, and Part Three: How to be Present in the Ongoing Process.

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Part One: How to End the Internal Cringe

I was ten years old when I first snuck onto my mom’s desktop and created a WordPress account. I wasn’t allowed to have a FaceBook yet, but I had a lot to say. Maybe it’s something my generation was born with, this need to share our thoughts and feelings into something as expansive and unknown as the internet. Maybe it’s something I personally was born with, this acknowledgement that I had something worth sharing. Regardless, I navigated the website pretty easily and soon enough posted my poetry and thoughts on a daily basis. Being ten-years-old meant that I hadn’t developed that internal cringe yet; I had no reason to believe that anyone might not like what I had to say. Naturally the blog would soon collect dust on the internet, left behind as I grew into my social exploration. The tab of a draft left unclicked as I made my first email and began the experience of always being in contact with my friends, even before I had a phone. As the years went on, and my connection to the internet evolved from flip phones to iPhones, from desktops to laptops, it was that very social exploration that would grow into my own personal internal cringe.

There are several blogs of mine floating in the void of forgotten internet pages, all with different intentions behind them and all left behind for quicker methods of connection. I didn’t like Instagram or Twitter at first, deleting my very first accounts only weeks after creating them. It seemed too fast at first, but my friends convinced me I had no other choice. When I found a way of making these accounts my own, I was instantly obsessed. Especially when I entered high school and everyone was using these social media accounts to share themselves as they’d truly like to be seen. At this point, the general internet was no longer the only intended audience, but also our peers, friends, and crushes. I prided myself on the compliments given to me specifically about the beauty of my Instagram feed. Being described as, “artsy,” and, “hipster,” made my fifteen-year-old heart beam. In retrospect, the hours and hours my best friend and I spent on FaceTime curating our past and future feeds together may not have been the most valuable use of our time. We’d scroll on each other’s feeds at the same time, asking, “Keep or delete?” over and over, until the words sounded weird coming out. Once finished with one of our accounts, the other would excitedly announce, “It’s my turn!” 

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Just like everything in life, this passion for perfection had its shadow side. This is where the internal cringe grew, like mold in the dark. One negative comment could make me instantly delete an entire post. Anxiety was the only thing I felt, waiting for approval to fill my notifications. I couldn’t post anything just because I liked it anymore; it had to fit the feed perfectly. Sometimes none of it would fit into the ideal self I wanted to show, so the whole feed would be deleted late on a school night. That also satisfied the air of mystery that I wanted to have so badly, despite my truer desire to share my authentic self. 

About a year before I started this blog, I deleted the Instagram I had been curating for years. It was bittersweet, like saying goodbye to an old friend that had seen the worst of me. For a few months, I stayed away from the app altogether. I had on and off created Twitter accounts, but none of them ever stuck because sharing a thought in the form of just words seemed too frightening. I had an obsessive phase with Tumblr, of course, because it’s entire purpose was curating an aesthetically pleasing feed, but soon I got tired of it too. It was exhausting letting the internal cringe have a say in everything I wanted to share on the internet.

I’m sure you have a similar experience in some regard. I’m well aware that I am not alone in my addiction to the perfect online identity. Even as the culture of the internet changes, like TikTok’s viral videos that are messy and strange, and the decline in popularity of aesthetically perfect feeds and vlogs, there is still that encouragement of cringing at certain content. I still find myself cringing at things posted to the internet, like the recent epidemic of faking mental illnesses on Tiktok, which I watch in neatly constructed compilations that emphasize the word ‘cringe’ in the title. Until I remember that these are other people that want to share themselves with others, just as much as I did when I was ten and I still do now. But which came first, the cringing at others or the cringing at ourselves? Although both go hand in hand, I knew that if I stopped worrying about the perception others’ have of my content then I would not feel like my perception of others’ content meant anything about them. 

Before you can become the creator of your dreams, you have to kill the cringe. Let your content disappear into the void and, at the same time, let the content you find from others float on peacefully. To be clear, we do need to be accountable for what we post and how it could affect others, because there is truly harmful content being posted on just about any platform. But there also needs to be room for recovery, for people to heal themselves and learn how to create what truly inspires the rest of humanity. So if your fear of sharing your content comes from your past harmful content or the fear that it will be considered harmful in the future, just remember that your concern is a sign that you’re an honest, kind, accountable person in the first place. Learn how to keep your self-love constant even as others explain their perception of your words, art, and creations. It’s in the nature of being a creator that you will always eventually outgrow what you’ve made before. Make room for the inevitability of change without needing to destroy everything you’ve made before. All of it deserves to be shared.

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Part Two: How to Begin the Creation of the Creator

Everyone has something different to share, even if it’s the same medium being used. That means that we all need different things from the method we share our content. Personally, I decided to remake an Instagram account but for a different purpose this time around. I knew that I wanted to share all of my content on one, concise platform, and that wasn’t going to be Instagram. Because of this, I could use my new Instagram for connecting with close friends. I don’t care about how many followers I have on there, just that they’re meaningful connections between friends, family, and strangers that really care about what I’m creating. I update my story and the link in my bio with the newest content from my blog, but with the intention of sharing it with those special, select few. This isn’t to say that I don’t want more people to see my content, but this way I remember that the goal isn’t the amount of people who saw it but the creation of the content itself. That’s another reason why I chose to have a blog, because it’s not a method of sharing that is easily found or can naturally go viral. I have built my method of creation to focus on the act of creating.

This may not be the same for everyone, like I said before. If your content is something you want the world to see now, then you might find yourself focusing your energy into TikTok, YouTube, or even Twitter. Make a list of what you want from the process of sharing if you’re not sure where to start. Of course, I advocate strongly for a blog because you can share any kind of content and focus on your development as a creator, but I understand that everyone has different needs. Since social media accounts are pretty self explanatory in their making, I’ll be mostly talking about how to start a blog and a podcast. For the most part, though, you can apply what I’m saying to any method of sharing you choose. 

I launched this blog on December 21st, 2020, with the intention of it being my final and most consistent blog. At the time, every astrologer I followed was talking about, “the Great Conjunction of Jupiter and Saturn.” I didn’t know much about what this meant, but it felt powerful to me. An article on Astrology.com explained, “When Jupiter and Saturn come together there is both the intensity of old forms dying as well as the fertility of new growth beginning to take shape.” I’m not trying to imply that you should launch your blog, podcast, or account on a particular astrological event (although that could be helpful if you enjoy astrology). I just felt this intense energy calling me to start on that specific day, something telling me that if I did this blog wouldn’t collect dust like all the others. And here I am, almost a year later, still posting and still passionate.

To be clear, I started working on the blog nine days before making it public. I structured the homepage and other important pages how I wanted and even wrote my first blog post. It took some time to get it together the way that I wanted, but that’s another thing I learned from this experience. Content creation seems like an instantaneous thing because of the nature of the internet. Truthfully, you can’t rush content you’re truly passionate about. I spent more time in my social media obsessed phase reviewing my content after posting it, but this is probably because I didn’t spend as much time working on it beforehand. I’ve fully come to terms with the fact that each blog post, podcast episode, painting, etc, will take me hours if I make it the way I truly want it to be. And as a result, I’ve spent less time looking at my content after the fact. I accept it as it is because I let it consume my time for as long as it needed to.

It’s not going to be easy to build a blog you’re satisfied with, especially if you’ve never made a website before. There is no editing the format of any other social media account, but that’s also what’s so beautiful about making blogs. That’s why I recommend them so highly. This can truly be something that reflects you in every way. For example, I like to change the background color of my blog to a different pastel every couple of weeks. I don’t know exactly where the desire comes from, but I know it reflects who I am as a creator in that moment. My font is specifically chosen. I edit the pages on my navigation bar frequently, whenever I need a new way of expressing myself. I’ve let the structure of my blog posts change over time without going back and editing my older posts to reflect my new habits. One of the greatest joys I experience in having a blog is admiring the evolution of it, rather than deleting the old content in a fit of anxiety at one a.m. Sometimes I wish I hadn’t deleted so many posts on my old Instagram for temporary satisfaction, so I could look back and see my past self exactly as she was. Now I can’t wait to look back at my blog posts when they’re years old, reflecting a past self I still love even if I’ve grown beyond her.

I really do hope that you consider making a blog. Since I’m not going to be explaining the technical side of things when it comes to creating a blog, I want to encourage you to play around with it. Like I said before, blogs don’t attract a lot of attention on their own. If you don’t tell anyone, or only tell a couple of friends, you can edit it in solitude until you’re ready to share it. You can take months playing around with different themes or building it from scratch. You can post some blog posts to see what it’d be like and let them drift off quietly into the void. There is a peacefulness in this world, where nothing is instantly consumed unless you want it to be. If you want to make a blog but you don’t want just anyone reading it, you can even password protect your blog posts. It can be anything you want it to be. I will say that of all blog-creating websites, I’m the biggest fan of WordPress. Maybe that comes from my personal internet origins, but it’s also really easy to use and super customizable. Plus, if you make a blog through WordPress I can follow your blog and watch you grow (which I would LOVE to do).

Podcasts are pretty similar in their flexibility to your needs. Of course, I can see why it would be a more intimidating platform. Since starting my podcast I’ve been asked by several people how I find the willpower to share my thoughts in my own voice, especially since I share it on Spotify where anyone can find it. I think I have an easier time with the idea of this because of the hundreds of YouTube videos I posted as a kid, so to me it doesn’t seem very different from that. But if you’ve never posted your voice or a video of yourself to the internet, I can see where the concern comes from. Here’s the thing, even though I share my podcast to Spotify I still only get an average of thirty or so listeners per episode. According to my analytics, almost all of those listeners come from people who clicked the link I shared to my Instagram story, so it’s really only my friends and family listening. Sure, if more people started listening to my podcast it would likely heighten my anxiety recording and posting each episode, but that’s why I practice now. On the other hand, I can see why posting content for just thirty views could be disheartening if your goal is to find your audience, but I cannot emphasize enough how important this practice is. The thing about people who’ve found big audiences for their online content is that they achieved it through their original, less popular content. Many people we perceive as big creators have been posting for years before we knew their name. If your goal is to have a large audience, you’re going to have to build it one listener at a time. Personally, I think that’s a beautiful thing. Each new listener will matter to you, and the connection you’ll have with them is so important.

Maybe I’ve convinced you to make a podcast, but now you’re probably wondering another question I get asked a lot, which is, “How do you think of what you’re going to say in each episode?” The truth is, I just turn the mic on. I remember when I recorded my first podcast episode, on August 3rd, 2021, I was thinking about astrology and I had so much I wanted to say. I’m in that time of life when all of my friends have spread all over the country and we all work at different times so talking on the phone isn’t as easy as it used to be. But I just had so much to say. Writing a blog post is one thing, but talking out loud and passionately is a totally different experience. So I drove to the Office Depot by my house and I bought the cheapest microphone I could find (this one, if you’re wondering). I went back home, downloaded Audacity because it was the best free recording software I could find on Google, and I started recording. Since I’ve made YouTube videos, I knew that having a consistent intro is pretty important in connecting with an audience. The intro came pretty naturally to me, “Hello my beautiful friends, my name is Sadie Olivia, and this is my podcast where I talk about astrology and things that just interest me because of my birth chart.” I wanted to start by establishing that I consider anyone who listens to my content a friend, then I introduced myself, and finally I summarized what someone could find in my podcast. I knew I’d talk about astrology a lot, but there were probably other topics that I would want to talk about in the future. I left it pretty open so that I could explore any subject I wanted in my future episodes. And finally, I just started talking as if I were on the phone with a friend equally as interested in astrology as I am.

Most podcasts have either a host and a co-host for ideas to move between, or they feature a different guest each episode. One thing I’ve learned in my years of content creation is that relying on others to create content with you can be difficult to navigate. I can’t even remember how many short film scripts I wrote that never turned into films because I relied too heavily on my friends to show up as actors. Making this podcast, I knew that more often than not I’d be talking by myself. This is my passion project, after all, and if I want it to happen I have to take it into my own hands. But as you know, I like to push people out of their comfort zones. So whenever I got the chance, I’d encourage someone I was spending time with to be on one of my podcast episodes. As of this moment, I’ve only convinced my two brothers to be featured on an episode, but I’ve let my friends know that I expect them to talk about something they’re passionate about on an episode eventually. I’m not saying you should pressure people in your life to be a guest on your podcast, but if you have the confidence and passion to make your own podcast you could inspire others to share their voice too. At the end of the day, if you want to make a podcast and no one in your life is ready to be a part of it, you just have to sit down and talk to the microphone by yourself. Your voice matters.

And if after all of this I’ve convinced you to make a podcast, here’s how I recommend doing it. Definitely buy a microphone within your budget because it’ll be much more satisfying than trying to use your headphones or laptop microphone. Like I mentioned before, if you need recording software to use I recommend Audacity because it’s free and easy to use. When it comes to posting it, you should make a RedCircle account, which is what I use. When you post to RedCircle, you can link your podcast to any streaming platform, like Spotify, Apple Music, YouTube, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music, etc. Each streaming platform has different requirements for streaming your podcast, but Spotify is the easiest one to stream to and it can be posted almost instantly, depending on how long your episode is. Okay, now I’ve given you everything. What are you waiting for?

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Part Three: How to be Present in the Ongoing Process

I’m pretty sure this is the hardest part of content creation. I posted to my YouTube channel for years and it still became the memory of a passion. Sure, part of me gives credit to the continuation of my blog to the Saturn and Jupiter conjunction that inspired me, but I know that I have to give a lot of credit to myself. One thing I did that really helped me was not confining my content to just one subject. I can post about whatever I want, whenever I want. I don’t have a schedule or a speciality because my blog and podcast are just methods of sharing my thoughts, wherever those thoughts might go. Sure, astrology and spirituality are my biggest subjects, but I would never stop myself from posting about something that doesn’t overlap those at all. The most important thing to inspire constant creating is to remember that the product isn’t the posts, it’s you. This plays on the acceptance of our evolution as creators, of course. You could make a blog and post about your favorite genre of books for years and then suddenly start posting about your passion for environmentalism and that would be a valid evolution. Anything is a valid evolution as long as what you’re posting matters to you.

There is this concept on the internet that a content creator can expire, and it’s especially the case when a creator shifts in what they create. YouTube is the best example of this; we’ve watched big name YouTubers disappear from the public view even if they still consistently post purely because their new content isn’t as popular. I admire the content creators who continue on in spite of the internet’s attitude towards change. As a creator, you don’t owe those consuming your content anything. And anyways, if they’re only a fan of a certain type of content then they’re not truly a fan of you. This isn’t something to be saddened by, either, because everyone is just following what they’re passionate about. Sometimes our passions as internet co-inhibitors will overlap and sometimes they no longer will, just as relationships in life outside of the internet. There is no inherent value in the quantity of consumption of content, but in the passion behind the content creator. As we watch the ebb and flow of internet popularity, I hope that internet culture makes more room for change in the future. But even if it doesn’t, your self-love and self-compassion is the only thing needed to embrace the creator you want to be. There have been times when I’ve wondered if I didn’t post readings for each sign how many people would still read my posts. Then I realized it doesn’t matter. Sure, it’s nice to give your audience something they can take away from the content, but that also doesn’t indicate the value of it. There are likely hundreds of thousands of blogs and podcasts with very few viewers, ones we may never see, but the creator behind them continues on posting anyways. What is your intention in sharing your creations? 

The internet is an ongoing and ever-expanding art museum of humanity. Sometimes you will be given a gallery in the main entrance that everyone has to walk past, and sometimes you’ll have to set up your exhibit in your own basement and invite people to come by (I’ve actually done this before and it was a great time). Remember why you create things, because I’m certain that if there is true passion behind what you’re making, then no one besides yourself is on your mind during the creating process. Keep this mindset during the sharing process.

You will always have a standard for your work, but ensure that it is yours and yours alone. If it helps, write down what your standard is so if the critics in your mind get too loud you can meditate on the truth. There will never be a perfect piece of work (and that’s why we keep on creating) but we can find true satisfaction in everything we produce knowing that it is helping us evolve into our truest selves. Be kind to yourself.

Just as I said before about picking the right platform, everyone will have different needs when it comes to keeping themselves consistent in the creation process. For some, setting aside the same periods of time every week could really help. But if you’re like me, you prefer the erratic inspiration. There is no wrong way as long as you know the importance of getting it done. You owe it yourself, and everyone else, that you share your unique perspective. No one else can create exactly what you create, so please give us the chance to see and feel life the way you do. 

As I said in the very beginning of this, creation is a part of our survival. Without it, the illusion that we are replaceable or not unique can make us doubt our own purpose. Especially since humanity has lost the true definition of purpose, which is not some grand event in which we save humanity or achieve all of our wildest dreams, but the decision we make each day to share what is uniquely us with everyone else.

Personally, I find that my purpose is to inspire others to create. Sometimes that means writing long how-to blog posts like this one, and sometimes that just means leadings by example. Even if you’re not ready to make a blog or podcast or post your content on any platform, I hope you took something away from this. I hope, in some way, you were inspired to embrace yourself a little more. 

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